Managing anger is largely down to making permanent lifestyle changes, which can be done most effectively at an Unconscious level with the use of Hypnosis and NLP.
When anger reaches the point where it is really affecting the way you live your life, then you need to take fundamental action to get your life back on track. Hypnotherapy and NLP help to calm the mind naturally and for the long-term, ensuring that the mind doesn’t over-react to situations. They will also give you the confidence that you can move forward and manage your life.
Changes can be made consciously, however with persistent effort and willpower. The recommendations below are Conscious Mind activities that can help you both avoid and alleviate anger.
- Take “Time Out”. Instead of reacting impulsively, train yourself to keep a lid on angry feelings until you have cooled down. When flooded with negative emotions, our ability to hear, think and speak are severely impaired. And no just 5 minutes is not enough! research suggests that people need at least 20 minutes to recover from intense psychological arousal. Then confront the situation (or person) calmly.
- Become Aware of what precipitates your anger. Most of us have identifiable triggers. Once you know the roots of your anger, you can deal with it more constructively.
- Monitor the feelings and bodily sensations you experience when you’re becoming angry. Learn to use these sensations as cues to stop and consider what is happening and what to do about it.
- Change the thoughts that trigger anger, interpreting the situation from a different (less provocative) point of view. Often, this involves looking at the situation from the other person’s perspective. Instead of, “Sue’s deliberately trying to make me look bad,” think “Sue must be having a bad day.” Instead of “How dare you cut me up, you damn homicidal idiot!” think “Maybe that driver didn’t see me.” Changing thoughts produces new feelings which displace the anger.
The quicker you can reinterpret a situation the better. Brooding fuels anger, but seeing things differently quells it. Reframing a situation is one of the most potent ways of controlling anger.
- Identify and express the feelings that precede anger. Anger is often a secondary emotion, erupting in the wake of other feelings, like frustration, resentment, humiliation, or fear. Try to become aware of the underlying emotion and express that feeling instead of anger.
- Respond assertively. The goal isn’t to suppress anger, but to express it in non-aggressive ways. Blaming, accusations, threats and name-calling are aggressive responses. Calmly and assertively stating your thoughts and feelings about a situation, without blaming, is a far more powerful way to respond in conflict.
Anger is a high-arousal state, so one of the most helpful things you can do is engage in an activity that lowers blood pressure and heart rate, like yoga, stretching, deep breathing, massage, visualization, guided imagery or meditation. Activities like gardening, painting, and woodworking may also be very helpful. Running, walking, dancing, swimming and other forms of aerobic exercise “work off” anger and leave you feeling relaxed.